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guys. GUYS. GUYS!
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THIS VIDEO. UGH!

I had to double check when I made my video 'Blank Page' because this video has apparently been in my WIP folder for almost a year now.
*hangs head*
I'll make a video, complete it, and then go back to work on this one, and over the span of ALMOST A YEAR, my vidding style gradually changes, so everytime I went back to work on it, I would CHANGE IT ALL! I am not joking when I say that I have 6 clips of the same 35 seconds of this video, redone, over, and over and over. In fact I may upload them later just to show you how much this video has changed from the original one I started.

and guess what! I still don't flippin like it. There are parts I like, I just don't know. UGH I DONT KNOW!

and Jamie! beautiful Jamie, I honestly don't know how she puts up with me sometimes. For real. She is like, the best person ever in the whole entire world.

So this is for aerintine  as an early birthday present, and to angearia as a late birthday present. And to all the wonderful ladies at seasonal_spuffy because you all left me such wonderful feedback and I haven't commented much on anyones stuff! I'm a horrible commenter! I should be shunned forever.

FAIR WARNING: I am NOT a writer, I woulnd't even call myself an adequate vid maker (though some people may disagree). I am very insecure, about everything I do, and everything I say. But I have to join in the aerintine love fest, because...
Enter shameless bragging here: I found her first!! and it would not be fair!/end shameless bragging.

I used to HATE Angel with a passion. Hell, I used to hate Buffy too! And then I met Jamie, and she forced me to grow and we grew together.

Her recent post about Angel (which if you have not read you should) reminded me about what a wonderful and talented person she is.

When Angel got his own show, I hated him. When Angel did anything independant to Buffy I hated him, even if his actions were good and pure I hated him. Because? of Buffy. Of his actions towards her. I could not seperate the two.

I hated Buffy because of the way she treated Spike. I didn't understand it and I didn't like it, and I hated her for it.

Then someone like Jamie comes around, and she infuses herself inside of a character and all the sudden I understand them. All the sudded I love them. All the sudded I'm smacking myself around calling myself a mo fo for being so blind.

Jamie has a way of seperating everything and everyone and showing people whats important about an indivdual, to the point where I don't know where she begins and they end, because she becomes them as she shows them to the world.

It's always been hard for me to seperate characters. It was all too simple before.
*If you loved Spike you hated Xander, you hated Buffy
*if you loved Buffy, you hated Angel, you hated Faith
*if you loved whomever you hated whomever ect, ect...

Unfortunately that's the way it still is for most people.

But Jamie seperates them all, shows you their inner personal growth without making another character invalid or unimportant.
Jamie made me love Riley! And I was always pretty indifferent towards him. She made me understand him, and while I disagree with some of his actions towards others, especially Buffy, I can understand them. Because one day Jamie decided to become him for me, and told me the who, what, and why he IS.

I have no idea if this is making any sense, but I had to say it.

Jamie is a beautiful, generous person and I am beyond grateful that she stalked my youtube page all those years ago, stroked my ego for making terrible videos, and became one of the best friends I've ever had.

all in all. Jamie and the entire BtVS/AtS fandom are my OTP :)

Happy Birthday aerintine 
ok, so I know it's not your birthday until the 19th, but I couldn't wait.

( Get Your Present )